Ice, Ice, Baby!

Iceman has always been one of my favourite X-Men/Marvel characters. His powers were just so cool. Well I’m pleased to say that Sideshow Collectibles thought so too. They are now stocking a polystone statue at a great reduced price. But it won’t stay that way for long. So get on over to http://www.sideshowtoy.com and grab hold of this ‘cool’ statue before it melts away.

<a href=”http://affiliates.sideshowtoy.com/Tracker.aspx?aid=3286&sku=200197&cid=18&#8243; target=”_blank”>Marvel Iceman Marvel Polystone Statue</a>

JM

Here comes Herman!

I love The Munsters, from the catchy theme tune to the creepy costumes, I’ve always loved it. So I was jazzed to see that Sideshow Collectibles are stocking this baby, and at a reasonable price too. Snap it up before someone else does and then sells them at a hike. Order yours today from http://www.sideshowtoy.com

<a href=”http://affiliates.sideshowtoy.com/Tracker.aspx?aid=3286&sku=902168&cid=-1&#8243; target=”_blank”>The Munsters Herman Munster The Munsters Maquette</a>

JM

The Long Goodbye (1973)

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Robert Altman brings Raymond Chandler’s private eye to life in this brilliant 70’s noir. Philip Marlowe (Elliot Gould) is a smart mouthed private detective in Los Angeles. He is asked by his friend Terry Lennox (Jim Bouton) to drive him down to Mexico as there are people looking for him. As Terry is Philip’s friend he does as he’s asked. However when Philip returns home, he is arrested for aiding and abetting a murderer, as Terry has been accused of murdering his wife. Philip is released from prison days later as Terry’s body is discovered in Mexico in an apparent suicide.

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Marlowe is then hired by the beautiful Eileen Wade (Nina van Pallandt) to find her violent alcoholic husband Roger Wade (Sterling Hayden). Then to add to Marlowe’s problems he is strong armed by a man named Marty Augustine (Mark Rydell), who seems to think Marlowe knows where his missing $350,000 dollars are. Marty said Terry had the money, and that Marlowe was the last one to see Terry, so it stands to reason that he knows where the money is. Needless to say that there is more going on than it first appears. Leading to a startling revelation and a few close calls.

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Elliot Gould absolutely steals the show as Philip Marlowe. He is mesmerising in the role, delivering his lines with a smirk on his face and a glint in his eye, he really is fantastic. The supporting cast are great too. Sterling Hayden is his usual gruff self as Roger Wade, the writer with a few demons of his own. Nina van Pallandt is great as Eileen Wade and is stunningly beautiful to boot. Mark Rydell is menacing and funny all at the same time as Marty Augustine, really getting into his role. There is also a very small cameo for a young Arnold Schwarzenegger as one of Augustine’s henchmen.

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This copy of The Long Goodbye was provided by the gracious folks over at http://www.arrowfilms.co.uk. You can head over to their site and pick up a copy of this wonderful film now. The transfer is second to none. Arrow always bring out the best in films, and never deliver anything short of extraordinary, and they don’t put a foot wrong with this release either. It is well worth a watch for those who like a good private eye story just like the good old days. Enjoy!

4/5

JM

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Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa (2013)

Alan Partridge in the studio

Alan Partridge (Steve Coogan) has been around for ages, however this is the characters first foray into movies. I must be honest and say that Alan is funnier in the movie world, than he was in the TV world. Alan Partridge works for North Norfolk Digital, a radio station in Norwich. He’s been there for some time and considers himself irreplaceable. However when a new company buys the station, Alan and another DJ called Pat Farrell (Colm Meaney) fear change is coming. Pat asks Alan to speak to the management and calm his fears. Alan goes to the management to tell them how bad it would be if Pat was sacked. However when he glimpses that the choice was between himself and Pat for the chop, he throws Pat to the wolves to save his own skin.

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Pat leaves but doesn’t take the news to well. He returns later that night with a shotgun and takes everyone at the station hostage. Thinking he has a friend in Alan, Pat asks that Alan be the mediator between himself and the police. Alan, being the person he his accepts, but uses the siege as a way of making himself more popular. Trying to appease Pat, but also secure himself a more lucrative future at the station.

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When I used to watch Alan Partridge on television I always used to find him a bit hit and miss. However with the movie, the writers have really pulled it out of the bag. Almost 95% of the jokes hit home. I couldn’t believe how funny it was, and it’s even better on the second viewing. Alan has some amazing lines and is endearingly sleazy, like a British Ron Burgundy. The soundtrack is also amazing. As much of a prat that Alan can be, he has an amazing taste in music, something I’m sure Steve Coogan had a hand in. Colm Meaney brings wonderful warmth to a character that you feel has been screwed over, and reacts how any desperate man would. Felicity Montagu is fabulous as the put upon Lynn Benfield, Alan’s PA. The rest of the supporting cast are also brilliant.

THE ALAN PARTRIDGE MOVE

I absolutely loved this movie. If you’ve always been put off by Alan Partridge, I urge you to give him one more chance with this movie. It is without a doubt my favourite of comedy of 2013. It just knocks it out of the park and is one I will definitely be watching again.

5/5

JM

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The Story of Ricky (1991)

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Ricky (Siu-Wong Fan) is sent to a maximum security prison after he kills the people who murdered his girlfriend. The prison he is sent to is run by a ruthless assistant warden who also has a gang of four ruthless assassins working for him. As the gang of four terrorise and kill the inmates, Ricky decides to stand up and fight.

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Ricky begins to challenge each of the gang and any other prisoners who stand in his way, cutting a bloody trail of carnage through the prison. Soon the prison warden comes to the prison to check what’s going on, determined to put an end to Ricky once and for all.

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Based on a Manga of the same name, The Story of Ricky is deliriously violent. It is chock full of guts being ripped out, brains being splattered and skin being flailed. There is so much about this movie that is laughably bad, yet I still love it. Firstly the acting is really bad, almost Troma bad. Yet some of the effects are quite well done for a movie that is 23yrs old. However, some of the effects, like the death of Ricky’s girlfriend, are hilariously bad. There are some decent fight scenes, but not something I’d call out and out martial arts.

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That being said, if you’re a fan of ultra violence, gore and splatter then it’s a pretty safe bet that you’ll like this film warts and all. Live action Manga rarely fares well, with the manic intensity of the animated version rarely matched in the live action version. I would say that it is well worth a watch. I think the fact that it plays it so straight doesn’t do it any favours. It would be much better if it was played a little more tongue in cheek. Like I said though, still worth a watch.

3/5

JM

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Severance (2006)

Tim McInnerny, Babou Ceesay, Andy Nyman, Claudie Blakely, Laura Harris and Danny Dyer in SEVERANCE

A group of work colleagues from a weapons company called Palisade Defence, are on a team building exercise in Eastern Europe. After the bus drops them off due to the road being blocked, the group decide to walk the rest of the way to the house they’ll be staying at during their trip. However they go to the old house that was used for the employees, and not the new one that they’re boss is waiting at. When they get there, the house is empty and covered in dust and mold. The group begin to settle in and explore the house.

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Things however begin to take a sinister turn, as the group realises that there is someone else out in the woods that is watching them. As they explore the house, they find that the company they work for were involved in some very dubious experiments many years before. Now the people that were experimented on want their revenge, and will do anything possible to see the whole group decimated.

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I must say I really like this movie. For me it’s Danny Dyer’s best role. Okay I know that’s not saying much but he really gives a good performance and has some hilarious lines. He’s brave when he needs to be and is consistently funny throughout. The supporting cast are great too. Laura Harris plays Maggie, who is great in the role. You also have Tim McInnerny, Toby Stephens, Andy Nyman, who all really get into their roles.

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The action is really well put together, and there is some great gore. There are also some really funny moments, including one where Andy Nyman’s character Gordon, bakes a pie he “found” in a cupboard. I think if there are people out there that haven’t seen this film, then I highly recommend it as it’s well worth watching.

4/5

JM

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Riddick (2013)

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Dear oh dear. Before I start let me say I dig the first two movies. I actually like Chronicles of Riddick more than Pitch Black, probably one of the few that does. I was jazzed when David Twohy and Vin Diesel announced they were bringing Riddick back. They did mention that they were returning to the bare bones type story of the first, rather than the grand spectacle of the second. However I wasn’t expecting an almost carbon copy of Pitch Black, which is what we have here.

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The story begins with Riddick stranded and alone on a desolate planet. Riddick is severely wounded and nearly every creature he comes across wants to kill him. Riddick then explains how he found himself in this unfortunate position and what he has been up to since the last movie. When Riddick realises that it’s time for him to leave the planet, he activates a beacon which alerts two groups of mercenaries to his position. The first group that lands are lead by Santana (Jordi Molla). The second group are a bit more high tech and they’re lead by Boss Johns (Matt Nable), father of William Johns (Cole Hauser) from Pitch Black.

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Riddick begins to despatch the men one by one, but stops when he realises they may all need to band together for the threat that’s coming. Now if I have made that sound exciting, believe me when I say it isn’t. The supporting cast who include Dave Bautista and Katee Sackhoff are wooden at best. The remainder of the supporting cast are throwaway and completely forgettable. Vin Diesel has some truly awful lines, pissing away any ounce of menace the character of Riddick had left. However Matt Nable who plays Boss Johns was surprisingly good, really giving the part his all. The CGI is terrible, and the action is truly mundane.

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There is a very brief cameo by Karl Urban as Vaako from Chronicles of Riddick, giving you a small taste of what used to be. Although to be fair, even Karl Urban looks bored. The plot and pretty much all of the perilous situations the characters find themselves in are far too similar to Pitch Black. This could have been something special. Instead we get a movie with terrible CGI backdrops and the majority filmed on what are clearly soundstages. Awful. This copy of Riddick was provided by the kind folks from Fetch Publicity. You can find their site at http://www.fetch.fm and also follow them on twitter @fetchpublicity for some great competitions and tweet alongs.

1/5

JM

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